Money Talks: Exploring Women’s Relationship with Money – Featuring: Erika Gilchrist

At DyMynd we focus on a woman’s relationship with money to break down the barrier for financial empowerment. Money has culturally been a taboo subject and we have found that women are told not to talk about it in public. This leads women to feel uncomfortable about their finances and uneasy to share their stories and experiences.
 
This year it is important that we breakdown these barriers so that we can all rise and stand together. DyMynd wants to bust the myth that “money isn’t for women” and help women forge new relationships with their money messages and experiences. 
 
In honor of Women’s Month, we have asked leading women to answer a few questions about their experiences with money. Today we are featuring Erika Gilchrist, an award winning speaker, emcee and author to share insights into her relationship with money. We invite you to read her responses and hope you get inspired and empowered to strengthen your own financial relationships.

What were your first experiences with money?

I received $2-3 dollars per week for allowance and was disgusted by it. I didn’t think it was enough. When I was a teenager, I was “strongly encouraged” by my grandmother to get a job when I turned 15 years old despite the fact that the legal working age was 16. She changed my birth year on my birth certificate to increase my age by 1 year. (Incidentally, this is also how I learned to alter documents) Whenever I got paid, I was “strongly encouraged” to contribute a third of my earnings to the household. This didn’t upset me, as I thought that this was the way things were supposed to be. I found myself spending my money on things that simply made me happy as a form of escape from the household drama that I often experienced.


What were the key messages around money that your family instilled in you?

I was taught that I should save money. The problem is that there was no substance surrounding that directive. I didn’t know how much to save, where to save it, when it was okay to spend it, and how much to spend. I also developed a strong secrecy around money – no one was to know how much money you made. I recall my grandmother telling me to “get her purse.” Each time it was in a different location hidden under, over, next to, or cloaked in some way. I had many thieves in my family, so hiding money became a natural part of my existence. To this day, I still have money hidden in multiple places. Who the hell am I hiding it from? Beats me…


What is your current relationship with money like?

I feel like I’m in a constant state of worry that there won’t be enough. Even when I have all of the bills paid and money in savings, I worry about when the bottom will fall out. What then? When I receive money, I look at my current priorities and disburse according to that. Very often I forego my “future self” to ensure that I’m taken care of in the present – “survive NOW!” I also feel a dynamic shift as I grow wiser, and I put my money in places where it can grow. I believe that your habits determine how well you shepherd your finances regardless of the whether you have very little or an abundance of. But then I also think, “Damn, when am I going to be able to test that theory?”